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What the Happiest, Most Successful People Know (and Do) About Their Personal and Professional Desires


Photo Courtesy of Christy Whitman


by Christy Whitman


The happiest, most successful people – and by this, I mean the people who actually fulfill their desires rather than being frustrated by them year after year. I mean the people who create positive change in their lives instead of just talking about those changes. By happy and successful, I’m referring to those who have learned to take the unwanted experiences that life sends their way and use them to clarify and go after what they really do want. 

Although they come from different backgrounds, professions and walks of life, high-performing, happy people all have one vitally important positive trait in common. They speak only in favor of what they desire, and do not speak against it.  

There is a proverb that’s been attributed to everyone from Lao Tzu, to Ralph Waldo Emerson, to Margaret Thatcher. It reads:

“ Watch your thoughts; they become words.

Watch your words; they become actions.

Watch your actions; they become habits.

Watch your habits; they become character.

Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.”

Regardless of who actually said it, this proverb describes an important universal truth: Our words have power, and with every word we speak, we are either creating a reality we desire, or a reality we dread. To join those who are living fulfilling, abundant lives, and who create their desires with ease, begin by becoming more deliberate about the words you speak.

Common and Uncommon Speaking

It’s common to rehash the unpleasant details of what’s happened in the past. It’s common to complain about what’s missing, what’s broken, or what isn’t yet working out according to plan.  It’s common to voice our self-doubts, and to marinate in thoughts such as “I can’t do it,” “Why is this so hard for me?” or “I’ll never get this done in time.”

Thoughts and words like this are common, and this is why it’s so common for people to live lives of frustration and despair, rather than the joyful and abundant lives we were born to live.   

It’s imperative to understand that anytime we’re speaking about an unwanted experience, we increase the likelihood of repeating that experience. We are constructing our version of reality with every word we speak.   

Every thought you think generates either positive or negative momentum, which means simply that if you think terrible thoughts, you’ll feel terrible, and are more likely to create terrible outcomes. And on the other hand, when the direction of your thoughts is in alignment with the positive outcomes you desire to create – such as, “I’m perfect for this project” or, “I like myself,” or, “I’ve succeeded many times before” –  the energy generated by these thoughts is high, light, moves fast, and feels fabulous

Every thought you have generates momentum – either in the direction of something wanted or something unwanted. With each thought you offer, you are choosing whether you create positive momentum or downward spirals. There are no neutral thoughts.  

As a master Law of Attraction coach who has spent nearly twenty years studying, applying and teaching the universal laws that govern deliberate creation, there are certain principles that hold true under virtually every circumstance. One such principle is the principle of alignment. This principle states that we attract into our lives whatever we are aligned with in thought, word, belief and energy. 

You can’t be focused on lack and create abundance. These energies reside at other side of the spectrum. You can’t be focused on loneliness or heartbreak and attract loveAnd you can’t talk about past mistakes or imagine future failures and create success. 

You attract experiences that are in alignment with your personal energy or vibration.   


Watching your words is one of the most immediate ways to increase your personal vibration. And it’s as simple as catching yourself when you’re about to head off the slippery slope of negative thinking, and shifting your focus to something that feels better. It’s choosing to think of situations in a way that feels better, not worse, and choosing to state things in a way that expands and encourages you, rather than brings you down.  From an energetic perspective, there is a huge difference between saying, “I can't afford it,” which constricts us, and saying, “I have other financial priorities right now,” or, “I’m choosing to spend my money on other things.” 



Remember that your vibration – meaning how you really feel in any given moment – is entirely yours to manage. 

You have the power to manage it from the inside-out, rather than waiting for anyone or anything else to change.

You do this by watching your words. Watching your thoughts. Being mindful of your perspective, your emotions and your actions. If you find your mood plummeting, notice how you’ve been speaking to yourself and how you’ve been speaking to other people about yourself.  How have you been thinking and speaking about your as-of-yet un-manifested desires?   

When you act as if what you want is already a part of your experience, you draw it to you. When you speak of its absence, you hold it at bay. What happy, successful people know is that talking in favor of their desires – imagining it, speaking it, writing about it, and most importantly feeling the presence of it – speed the manifestation of that experience into your life.  

With the words we speak, we can become our worst enemy or our biggest cheerleader.

 So the key to success is to feel how you want to feel even before your desire manifests. If you want to create massive success, deliberately recall all of your past successes and allow yourself to be bathed in that energy. Nothing in your outer reality has to change in order for you to feel massive success. Success beyond our imagination is ours to feel right now, or the sense of freedom or the sense of love, and then when we do that, we're in that vibrational place of that success or that abundance or whatever it may be.



Photos of Christy Whitman Courtesy of Christy Whitman

Graphics by ImageMakers & Influencers Magazine


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