Micro Attention Spans

by Melissa Concessio

“I did not succeed in life by intelligence.

I succeeded because I have a long attention span.”

— Charlie Munger (Warren Buffett’s Business Partner)

Why do the most successful and busiest people in the world take the time to pay attention to building deep connections while others are too busy multi-tasking that they end up in shallow acquaintances and lose the people closest to them?

The mother of these problems is simple yet profound:

The Shortened Attention Span

Doing things like nurturing friendships require a long attention span. Over the past few years, our attention spans have made a catastrophic shift. This attention deficiency isn’t only hitting our productivity but it’s also damaging our relationships.

Microsoft Canada used ECG to monitor 2000 selected people as they executed tasks. They found that the human attention span has decreased to 8.25 seconds, lower than that of a goldfish, who scores 9 seconds.

And that was all before COVID-19 hit us!

As the workplace, home and social lives merge into one unavoidable screen, we’re forced to live in a virtual world rather than in the real world. We often find ourselves constantly taking breaks from real people to check on our smart phones — mostly apps that push notifications our way.

Think about it, when was the last time you had an hour long conversation and did not check your phone?

Harvard University researcher Trevor Haynes states, when you get a notification, your brain sends a chemical messenger called dopamine that makes you feel good. Dopamine is associated with food cravings, workouts, gambling, drugs like cocaine… and now smart phones.

Lab experiments gave rats dopamine bursts at random intervals. The result? They grow anxious, always hoping for another hit.

We find ourselves multi-tasking in an online world where we constantly seek engagement to fuel our dopamine receptors. I call these Dope Drivers. A constant need to excite your brain has become the modern day necessity.

Dope Driver Challenge #1 WAR on Attention

There is so much information out there and we seem to be consuming a lot! Almost 8 billion average daily videos are watched on Facebook every single day and the world population stands at 7.8 billion. Clearly, we are watching a lot of videos and that’s just one platform.

We find ourselves over consuming information that is made to look like it’s important and urgent. This works because as humans we are curious to know and gain new information. Our curiosity gets more intense when we’re given a snippet of something. In today’s heavy saturation and competition of information, companies need to drive revenue through the engagement of more and more users. It’s getting harder to focus as we are distracted by Information Overload.

Dope Driver Challenge #2 Notifications are Virtual SLOT Machine Levers.

A meta-analysis of 41 studies showed that multi-tasking in a highly stimulating online environment is associated with poor cognitive performance. A study by Ming Peng has concluded that attention span decreases after spending a few minutes online while reading a magazine for the same amount of time does not produce that effect.

Why?

Seductive design interfaces are feeding on our insecurities and addiction. These schemes tempt the users’ attention and make them check their phones, only to be pulled into another session of social media pleasures. This turns counter-productive, as they are distracted from their tasks at hand.

A former Google employee worriedly speaks about the design features of social media. Persuasive designs and push notifications constantly tempt people psychologically to open them. The red dot beside the apps on screens tells users that they need to check what’s new in-store, and the user opens them out of psychological persuasion. The employee also compared the ‘pull to refresh’ feature to a slot machine where the user pulls the lever and waits for something new to come up.

Dope Driver Reason #3 Fear of Missing Out on Social (FOMO)

Back in the day, we didn’t have internet access at our fingertips usage as compared to today. Social media apps flood our phones and the current world events are too interesting to miss out on.

In this new age, they’ve given us an outlet to seek such small moments of guilty pleasures, where we get to know what’s happening in the current atmosphere, and a mirage of what we think is connecting with our favorite people.

Individuals who have ’FOMO,’ become easy targets. The need to be updated about everything makes individuals constantly seek new information on the internet.

Addiction Counsellor Steve Rose states that Social media gives users pleasurable effects similar to the ones experienced from constant validation, and they build a reputation through likes and comments. There is also a feeling competitiveness towards their other online peers which also feeds insecurities.

We can refer to such a type of scheme as the ‘information rewarding scheme,’ where users are psychologically persuaded to constantly check on their phones for new content. When something new is found, like a big announcement, or a very important news piece, they obtain a sense of reward which satisfies their desires. Even when there are no notifications, users tend to keep on inspecting and refreshing their social media to find out what’s new.

The IMPACTS of the three Dope driving challenges aka WAR on our attention, Notifications virtual slots and Social FOMO activates the death of true Social Connection we need to thrive as Humans.

Dope drivers make the average human of today lonely and more disconnected than ever.

Information overload is causing intense fatigue and listening to other people becomes a boring and demanding task.
In a constant search for something new our increasing curiosity coupled with constant stimulation from the internet makes us hooked on to technology while we lose out on making true connections.
Even if material success has gone up and life satisfaction has gone down.

So, is the solution banning the online world?

Not so quick! It’s clear that the online world has become an integral and unavoidable part of our lives. But the skill lies in deliberately utilizing the online space to our advantage and not our detriment.

The truth is we aren’t addicted to the actual phone but what’s behind the phone. Human connection — a fundamental part of being human ingrained into our evolutionary biology. Humans are social creatures and grow stronger with associations.

This encouraged me to do a deep dive into human connections in the online world. Research reveals, people who can learn to use the online world for a true connection, win.

A compelling skill that proves why increasing your attention span is more important than ever in this Attention Deficit Economy.

“Attention is vitality. It connects you with others.

It makes you eager. Stay eager.”

― Susan Sontag

Science reveals adults may ultimately be able to harness the use of online platforms to overcome isolation and thus continue to benefit from the diverse range of physical, mental and neuro- cognitive benefits associated with social connection.

Here are my recommendations for three effective disciplines.

Discipline 1: Ground Your Notifications To Increase Attention Bandwidth

Smart mobile phones are the number one attention span murderers.

I’ve kept my phone on ‘Do Not Disturb’ mode for years now. Check your phone and see which applications notify you. Turn off all unimportant notifications. You can tweak this individually for every app in the settings. When your phone doesn’t ping announcing notifications the chances of being distracted decrease.

I originally tried monitoring my use by downloading another app to stop me from using apps but none of that worked. So I did this — phone goes to another room like it’s grounded. During family time I put my phone in a room where I can’t be tempted to pick it up. Out of sight, out of mind.

Discipline 2: Brutal Prioritization helps you harness a longer attention span.

Imagine this — You’ve got a meeting full of board members and you have 30 seconds to tell them why they should invest $1million into your project. What would you put in that pitch? Only the most important stuff right?

You are a VIP and a basic fundamental question is to know what’s important for today. Answering this question every day can change your life.

When I realized the power of brutal prioritization I started to apply it to my life.

In 2013, I found a way to exterminate everything that was not important on a daily basis. This helped me not only beat procrastination and indecisiveness but also I realized reality was different after I brutally prioritized my day. Here’s what happened:

I always had extra time and bandwidth for something exciting to share with people. I was never tired from unimportant stuff or trying to multi-task through it all.
I could raise the attention levels of myself and others around me in the interaction. I was mentally always present.
I’d be prepared with the right words that communicated my actual intention.
Engaging conversations got me, a young kid, in with Executives in the C-Suite arena. I found myself being invited to high stake pitch meetings.
I could identify the patterns of time periods of attentive/efficient work. Some people are highly attentive in the mornings, some get lethargic after meals, and some are at their best at night. I found out how to use any left over anxiety to make me more productive before I let it all go.

If you are interested in learning more about brutal prioritization, my team and I have spent days creating a valuable course that successful game changers in society use. It will help you quickly use brutal prioritization in your everyday life.

Discipline 3: Master how to truly connect one-on-one online

Fear of missing out stems from our true inner desire to connect. Humans are social animals. There are a bunch of skills we can all learn to be more connected. Less than 1% of people master the art of making a true connection.

Here’s how to stand out in seconds by truly connecting.

One of my favorite ways to connect is to Give, Give, Give when you first meet anyone — A dialogue process that ends up in energy flow so that conversation becomes effortless which means spending time on social media likes and profile to look your best is a waste of time but spending time one-on-one direct messaging or commenting and getting into a deep conversation on mutual interests is an investment.

In his classic book “Think and Grow Rich“, Napoleon Hill described the Mastermind concept as, “The coordination of knowledge and effort between two or more people who work towards a definite purpose in a spirit of harmony…no two minds ever come together without thereby creating a third, invisible intangible force, which may be likened to a third mind”, also known as, the Mastermind.

This relates directly to your attention span with much reflect on the relationships you form and the connections you make. It works both ways in relationships — if you are able to give attention, you receive attention and engagement in return.

If you wish to be successful, i.e. mentally and physically rich, you need to make deep connections with people.

Our short attention spans will get better with time when we sincerely take the hard road initially that ends up becoming the easy road. The positive effects would be you developing an attention muscle giving you better grasping power, understanding of situations, better relationships with people, and you spending time productively on relationships will go a long way.

If you reached the end of this article you should be proud, most people have given up by now due to short attention spans.

The future belongs to those that master the attention advantage to truly connect!

Melissa Concessio.png — Meet Melissa Concessio

Melissa is a **Personal Development Expert**. Her quick to-the-point strategies and empathetic storytelling has changed the lives of Fortune 500 executives and individuals – even more so during the current challenging times.
As a true champion of diversity and owning her cultural heritage, she associates her identity with being part of five completely diverse groups – **Australian, Indian, Chinese, Middle Eastern and American.**
Growing up in an extremely harsh environment with domestic violence, Melissa’s life mission is to help others to fuel their fire and excel through personal growth. With her High Impact Learning & Educational Experiences, Melissa is the speaker and writer for the audiences of today.
She creates custom tailored material to deliver to your audience with IMPACT. Her reputation precedes her as the easy going, no-stress speaker and writer that clients love to work with.
When not connecting with others through speaking, writing and creating an impact, Melissa is an adventure sport enthusiast.
**To book Melissa as a speaker or coach, please visit her website here** **https://melissaconcessio.com**
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Article written by Melissa Concessio with minor editing by ImageMakers & Influencers Magazine. Headshot image courtesy of Melissa Concessio. Graphics by ImageMakers & influencers magazine.

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